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an end to the hopeless cycle of emotional eating and desperate dieting |
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Ellen Shuman is a Life Coach who specializes in emotional and binge eating issues. She is the founder of A Weigh Out & Acoria Eating Disorder Treatment, Vice President of the Binge Eating Disorder Association (BEDA), and Co-Chair of the Academy for Eating Disorders Special Interest Group on “Health at Every Size”, ellen@aweighout.com
This was written by a woman ready to embark on the journey of recovery.
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I wish I could enjoy eating without this animosity. However, I have this problem they call binge eating. I get these intense feelings I can not always recognize. But I know that if I eat, the feelings will soon subside. Eating brings such pleasure; all my feelings set aside. However, once the food is gone- guilt crops up from deep inside. Wondering how I could do this to myself, I start to descend -
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Recovery from emotional and binge eating does not come with a perfect upward trajectory. So I get very excited when my coaching clients come to understand that they can CONSCIOUSLY turn things around even after a downward turn.
Allison (not her real name) was beating herself up after eating a lot during the the second half of a cruise (who doesn’t overeat on a cruise?). But rather than stay in that familiar, “I blew it, I’m hopeless” place, soon after she returned home she decided to turn to her emotional regulation and empowerment tools. She refocused her attention on
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I love writing this Emotional Eating Blog, “Weigh This Instead”. But in the past few weeks I have acknowledged that staying up late at night writing is just not “self-care”. I’m not practicing what I preach! (For me, lack of sleep is a trigger for emotional eating.)
So I started looking for a solution that would allow me to get the writing done without risking sleep and/or my recovery. I made the decision to
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I was walking to my theater seat this past Sunday when I heard someone call my name. It was an old friend whom I had dropped like a hot potato about nine years ago. She had been a good friend for eleven years prior; someone I had cared about a great deal…someone who I believed cared about me, as well.
But I was in a bad space nine years ago; feeling particularly emotionally vulnerable. On two occasions in a row I had dinner with this person and left feeling hurt by something she’d said. All these years later, I still remember details of those perceived slights (funny how we don’t tend to remember all the good stuff that’s said to us ).
Thinking back to her comments now, I know I distorted what happened to fit how insecurely I was feeling at the time. Her comments were not really that big of a deal. But back then, whenever I felt hurt, rather than acknowledge my feelings and using my voice, I would simply push “the invisible button” and eliminate from my life anyone I thought had slighted me.
I learned this behavior as a child. Feelings were NEVER processed in my family. Conflict often lead to the end of relationships.
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Desperate to lose weight…Most people who have struggled with emotional and binge eating, and who struggle with body dissatisfaction, can identify with feelings of desperation. How many of us have asked,”What will it take for me to finally be motivated to lose weight?”
Desperate to lose weight…Many people I speak with say they thought learning they were pre-diabetic would do the trick. But even that didn’t stop the emotional eating. The most dramatic example I can share came from
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A few years ago, Kathy, a client of mine sent me a wonderful card. To this day it sits on my desk and serves as a gentle reminder of my responsibility to make my life what I want it to be. Here’s what the card says…
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The following was written by a person who is in the process of recovering from emotional eating. For many, many years she has struggled with her relationship with food and her body. She emailed a very personal description of her stages of healing. She asked me to share it with others, if I thought it might help others. I do! Here’s what she wrote…
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Stage One: I was engaging in emotional eating and completely unaware of the triggers and felt I couldn’t stop.
Stage Two: Then I was becoming aware of the triggers, but only AFTER I engaged in the emotional eating.
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About a decade ago a client in our Binge Eating Disorder Treatment Program handed me this poem. At the time we published it in our newsletter. I just read it again for the first time in 10 years and was struck by how beautifully it describes my hopes for the A Weigh Out Members’ Circle. I’m pleased to share it with you here…
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Swallowed Anger Swallowed Pride Makes a Person Feel Empty Inside How Can I Fill This Void And Feel Good? It Seems That I Have Always Used Food.
Food has been Comfort, A Good Friend Indeed It Has Calmed My Anger My Hurt and My Need No Longer My Friend, I Cast You Aside And Look For a New Friend That Won’t Let Me Hide I Want to Reveal My Hurt and My Shame I Hope That the Sharing Will Help Ease My Pain.
Please Tell Me Your Story And I’ll Tell You Mine We’ll Do This Together You and I, We’ll Talk and We’ll Listen We’ll Cry and We’ll Feel Before You Know It, We’ll Start to Heal.
LAL Feb. 6, 2000
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I hope you’ll use the A Weigh Out community to help you connect with others and to help you heal. How? Talk about your struggles, ask your questions (there’s an “Ask A Question” Box on your right), share your insights…and your victories. Comment on these blog posts and particpate in the “A Weigh Out Empowerment Network Groups” (access through the Members’ Links to your right or through the Members’ Portal). You might be interested in a new group that’s been created by people who wish to discuss the Weekly Tools. There are many people here who understand and are ready to support each other! Join the conversation! You are welcome in the Circle!
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Ellen Shuman is a Life Coach who specializes in emotional and binge eating issues. She is the founder of A Weigh Out & Acoria Eating Disorder Treatment, Vice President of the Binge Eating Disorder Association (BEDA), and Co-Chair of the Academy for Eating Disorders Special Interest Group on “Health at Every Size”, ellen@aweighout.com
For people in recovery from Binge Eating Disorder, relationships are usually where a lot of healing can happen. Conflict with people is often especially scary, and can be a significant trigger for overeating or for bingeing to numb the stress.
One of the things I have found useful for people is to commit to do the following steps when you feel angry about an interaction with someone important to you.
Read More >> Members' Login located in the right sidebar, then click on Emotional Eating Blog in Member Links
Not yet a Member, Click here, learn about Free Trial
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